J accepted a job offer from abroad, so now he's making all the necessary travel and housing arrangements, with his departure date contingent on how quickly he can get his visa. I'm really happy for him and also kind of envious because I'd love to take on a position like that, but mostly I'm just unfathomably sad. Not sure how I got through work today without spilling a tear. I've been waiting all day to come home and let it out, except now I just feel numb. I know I'm overreacting...but I'm afraid of what's going to happen now that it's going to be a long-distance relationship, in the truest sense. Now that I think about it, I've spoken to him almost every day for the last four years. We agreed from early on in our relationship that there's no reason not to make it work if the feelings are there, but now that I'm not sure when we'll see each other again...I don't know how to feel. These days it seems like Life is throwing one thing after another at me to sap the happiness out of my days.
It feels like my better half is going to be torn away from me soon. I know this is way more emo than I typically care to show, but I don't know how else to express it. It's not the end of the world, but I didn't think it would actually hurt this much. Ugh. Damn this fragile heart.
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